Project Me

It's just high time I stopped being so lazy. I'm not happy looking and feeling the way I do. I remember feeling so much better about my self-image back when I was really putting in the effort. So I put pencil to paper and worked out my BMR per Misty's instructions, though I still have some questions about how to factor in exercise and still eat the proper amount of calories. I hope she can shed some light on that.

Today is the first day out the gate. I messed up though by waking too late to have a decent breakfast and didn't even get to have a second cup of coffee because I needed to truck us out to Darlington Park. It was a bit of a mad dash. When I got home I had a hodge podge of lunch. A leftover stuffed pepper (1/4 c total: barley, sundried tomato, carrots, onions, mushrooms, toasted sunflower and pumpkin seeds) then I split a cheese stick in half and wrapped the halves in lean deli ham. Chased the whole lunch down with a nectarine and that second missing coffee from this morning. Yeah see, I told you it was strange.

Dinner tonight will be another mish-mash of stuff. Was thinking of making a toasted Ezekiel muffin with a smear of jam, a hard boiled egg and 1/2 c of sweated chard/mushroom mix. I just don't feel up to sitting down and eating pasta and meat sauce that I'm making for the guys. Once I'm home after my run I'll have a protein smoothie and will snack on some fruit and almonds while I get some work done for Misty.

I never have much of an appetite on days when I run and especially after I run. This weather doesn't bode well with me. I hope that moving this to the forefront of my mind that I can get back to where I need to be. It's hard to watch someone decline so badly in their not so old age. Even worse knowing that the things I fail to do today will result in my kids watching me go down the same path *shudder*